The Adventures of Shen and ShaSha: ShaSha and Karate Kid II

7.4.11 ShaSha LaPerf 0 Comments

For the past two months, Shen and I have had a thing over the Karate Kid. He's a fan of the original movie. After seeing the remake I decided that I enjoyed the remake better because a few more things in the movie made more sense. But Shen refuses to see the movie because he has an irrational hate for the entire Smith family and also is not a fan of Jackie Chan due to his somewhat controversial lifestyle. He also has the same complaint most people have about the remake: the movie is about Kung Fu and not karate. While I do agree that's a totally stupid move to keep the Karate Kid name, I also shot back at Shen that Ralph Macchio and Pat Morita aren't doing any damn karate in those movies either.

So last weekend, Verizon was having one of those free weekends for Encore and Starz. I really don't get why anyone pays for these channels, seeing as movies like Showgirls and Starship Troopers is in their lineup. And interestingly so was The Karate Kid II.

It has been years since I'd seen KKII. I think as a kid I liked it because it took place in Japan and it had karate and shit. But as an adult I found myself realizing how ridiculous the movie was. And I laid it out to Shen as we watched. Shen and I often talk during movies; yes we would be the people in the back row whispering back and forth about what's going on.

Anyway it doesn't take me long to get into the movies faults:

Me: WTF with all the English in this movie? None of these "Japanese" people in "Japan" are speaking Japanese. See look! Even when Mr. Miyagi's talking to his chick they're using English all the time. I call shenanegans on this!
Shen: Because they're in Okinawa. There are military bases there.
Me: Whatever! They filmed this shit in Hawaii!

Actually I ranted about the lack of Japanese throughout the entire movie. Despite my non-fluency of Japanese even I noticed that the actors sounded a bit off with the little Japanese they actually used. Shen and I contemplated over why the movie was mostly in English then remembered that back in the day folks were just too damn lazy to read a movie with a lot of subtitles (including me before I got into anime).

The more I watched the movie and ranted the more Shen found himself questioning things as well. He decided that the Japanese girl in the movie was "too hot" for Ralph Macchio (he felt that way about Elizabeth Shue in the first movie was well). We actually started laughing at the scene with the young girl who's ringing the bell during the typhoon, not quite understanding why the hell the little girl was left alone in the storm anyway. We laughed at how the movie panned out whenever Mr. Miyagi fought, an obvious sign that there's a stunt double in his place. And we laughed at the hilariously bad 80s fashions. Ralph Macchio's pants were so high and tight I wondered if he had a serious "meast infection" (male yeast infection) by the time the filming of the movie was over. I also didn't get why Mr. Miyagi only had one outfit through 95% of the movie. We also decided that Christian Bale spent hours and hours watching The Karate Kid II in order to get Toshio's pointless "gruff, evil" voice down for his Batman role. The movie ended with managing to take a last few shots at the film.

But hey, I don't actually hate the Karate Kid or any of its sequels. I just think they didn't age well. Any Karate Kid movie is certainly better than Showgirls and Starship Troopers though. As for Shen, I didn't totally get him on my side, but he did agree that I'd made some valid points. Maybe one of these weekends I'll slip the new Karate Kid into my DVD player. Let's see if he'll be able to match my movie snark...