How NOT To Promote BW/AM Couples

30.6.11 ShaSha LaPerf 4 Comments

So I'm sure most of you have heard or read the hoopla over an article posted on chinaSMACK about African women and Chinese men. The article was actually just a direct translation from what some guy posted in an open forum on the Chinese site Tianya.

When we hear about BW/AM couples getting the spotlight you want it to be a good thing. Unfortunately the only thing this article seems to be getting is a bunch of negative press which of course means negative press for real couples out there. As if the gap between Asian men and black women wasn't wide enough, people took the opportunity to dump on both Asian men and black women, spewing all types of racists shit.

A racist asshole will always be a racist asshole, especially when they can hide behind a computer screen. So seeing them say stupid shit isn't a shock to me nowadays. But I was more annoyed at the original Tianya poster (who will be known as OTP from this point on).

But wait, I know some of you are think, "how can you be mad at OTP? He was showing the beautiful off BW/AM couples!"

Umm no he wasn't. His posted is riddled with troublesome stuff that gave racists idiots fuel to begin with. And chinaSMACK didn't help things either. Promoting BW/AMcouples? Methinks not. and here's why:

When your "She's so pretty" really means "She's pretty for a black girl," you're NOT promoting BW/AM couples.
Why is it in interracial couples there's always a need to talk about how beautiful the couple is and/or how cute the babies are? There are a lot of good-looking same race couples out there but I hardly hear people going on and on about it. And usually when it's a BW/AM couple it's always on how cute the girl is. It's a bit hard for me to explain, but it really reminds me of the "you're pretty for a black girl/dark girl" line. Is the assumption that black women are ugly so strong that there is a need to say "see, she's pretty!" so they can prove someone wrong? I got this feeling from the OTP, especially with his comments about how these women weren't fat or oily. I'm not sure if his original belief is that black women are "oily" or if it's a common belief in China and he wanted to prove them wrong. But it fails either way. If you truly think a black women is beautiful then by all means say it. But who wants a compliment based off you're shock that a black women could be attractive?

When "Date BW or AW because no one else wants you!" is in your head, you're NOT promoting BW/AM couples.
OTP outright says that Chinese men marrying African women can help balance the over abundance of men in China. In fact he mentions this idea several times throughout his post. His sentiment is pretty similar to a lot of people, including Asian men and black women themselves. Sorry but if an Asian guy said to me "we're in the bottom of the barrel so we should just date each other," I'd tell him he sounds like a loser and I don't date losers. Seriously, date people because you like them, not because you feel you don't have any other options. Guys, encourage your friends to date black women because we're gorgeous, out-going and smart, and ladies your eyes should be on that Asian guy because he's funny, got a nice set of abs and a great smile and not because the white/black/Latino guy you were clamoring for turned you down.

When you're not invested in BW/AM relationships, then don't talk about them, you're Not promoting BW/AM couples.
Sites like Blasian Narrative are ran by people that have a genuine interest in relations between black women and Asian men. When you see a post on that site, you better bleieve you'll find real commentary and shit that doesn't allude to BW/AM parings as being a freak show. OTP on the other hand, just seemed fascinated by the idea of such couples. He never mentions if he would date black women or if he's even had an actual contact with them. His treatment of BW/AM couples is that they're basically a freak show. "OMG! LOOK AT THIS! A BLACK WOMAN AND A CHINESE MAN! IT'S SO RARE! LOOK AT THEM LOOK AT THEM!"  BW/AM couples already get shit from people that hate the idea and this isn't helping much either.

When you let racist asshole run over you, you're NOT promoting BW/AM couples.
I'm not fluent in Chinese, but I made my way through most of OTP's threa on Tiayna. There are about 9 pages so far and interesting there's a shift from the focus on BW/AM couples to AM/WW couples? Why/ Because someone asks him to post it. OTP, had he really been invested in BW/AM couples, would have said, "Fuck off! We're not talking about white women here!" He just keeps posting pictures until eventually he let the focus move to white women with Asian men. Now I'm not sure how Tiayna works so I don't know if they would even allow two different forum threads of similar topics. However, despite the fact that there are many rather nasty comments about black women, he never tells the haters to STFU. Seriously go to any website about BW/AM couples and people will shut them down the moment they start with the racist remarks. OTP's silence reinforces the idea he's only posted because of he had a strange fascination at the BW/AM couples and not much else.

So that's it. Had the OTP actually put more thought into what he was posting, he could have potentially opened a few more minds. Now I can't see that this guy should get all the blame. Racist people look for opportunities to be assholes. However OTP surely didn't help anything either. I hope one day this guy will actually get over the "freakshow" idea of  BW/AM couples and actually put effort into giving them real support.


  1. Gee! OTP almost there. His article could have been a good one,but it's apparent that he's absolutely racist and clueless about BWAM.

    I first learned about ChinaSmack when I was looking for information about Lou Jing,but once I got a hold of that site I was like "OMG..are they serious? It is sooo unbelievable that that site is still up and running. I've read a lot of international publications,but never have I read anything as racist and juvenile as the stories on that site. I'm not going to pretend that I'm an expert of journalism or writing,but that has got to be some of the most poorly written articles that I've ever read.I just hate how the author made something that was supposed to be so beautiful seem ugly.

    I agree, instead of telling the world that they exist, he gave negative reason that BWAM shouldn't date. If I was a writer and if I was discussing BWAM couples I would 1)describe the man as" handsome", the woman as " lovely" or the both of them as being a "lovely couple". 2) Talk about the history of BWAM relationships 3) Talk STRICTLY about them and defend it. OTP just screwed up big time with this.

    It is said that China is the country to look at far as prosperity. While I don't think that everyone in China has that kind of racist mindset,some of the netizens still live in the dark ages when it comes to race relations. Some of the citizens call ChinaSmack and other news like that as " sensationalist news", I call it racist news.

  2. Yeah I don't have chinaSMACK on my daily viewing list. It's like an obnoxious version of the site JapanProbe.

    I don't think the OTP expected the forum thread to get out and I'm curious to know if he even knows that it was picked up by chinaSMACK and other sites. I didn't seem him mention anything about the spread and I think the last post on was sometime last week. The whole ordeal just reminds us that despite the growing number of interracial couples, the BW/AM pairings will still be seem as something as the "Bigfoot" of IR dating.

  3. Great post! I believe the OTP may be someone seriously promoting Chinese men going abroad to marry foreign women as a mean of 'conquering' the world. With this in mind, what zie's written is not too surprising, this person is not trying to promote BWAM couples specifically.

    Interestingly, it was pointed out elsewhere online that the OTP's use of 'fat black aunty' and 'greasy' actually pointed to the influence of Western stereotypes of Black people through globally consumed Western media.

  4. I didn't really know about the chinaSMACK site until reading about it here. It's pretty embarrassing to be honest (as a Chinese/Viet American) because I know there's a stereotype that Asians are 'the most xenophobic people.' To that I say... "kind of."

    1) Let's face it, a lot of the Western Internet is racist as well. As a gamer, I've yet to play an online game that didn't have some 12 year old referring to you as a homosexual black man in more colorful language.

    2) I don't think it would be a stretch to say that the cure for racism or prejudice is to simply be around people of other color. There aren't a lot of black people in Asia, and in Asian media they are often stereotyped as caricatures that would be downright offensive (Uncle Tom type shit.) I guess my point here is that Asians being more xenophobic has more to do with the fact that Asian countries are still very homogeneous compared to other countries rather than some genetic or even cultural predisposition towards being racist assholes.

    3. I don't have any real evidence to back this up, but I do have a theory that OPEN racism just happens to be more tolerable in Asia. This is mainly due to the fact that, to my knowledge, Asian countries don't have as much 'historical baggage' as many Western countries, which enslaved Africans from their homeland for centuries. Of course, it's well known that there's historical animosity between Chinese/Japanese/Koreans, but to my knowledge there isn't much African-Asian interaction until the last century (correct me if I'm wrong though.) Whites in the US tend to be VERY anti-racism, much more so than minorities that I know. It's labelled as white guilt, but I see it more as the fact that racism is so shamed in this country because of its ugly past. I mean, look at Germany, a country that I would argue has gone overboard on political correctness and destroying freedom of speech.

    Anyways, that post was rather long. Basically, yeah Asia is a little bit more racist and xenophobic than the parts of the States that I've lived in, but honestly it's more ignorance than genuine malice. I really hope Asia becomes more multi-cultural in the future; hopefully any non-Asians will help make that happen should they care to visit Asia.